FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Michele Bachmann new spokesperson for Christian Democrats
In an unprecedented “change of heart,” ultra conservative Tea Party favorite turns to the other side
Washington, DC – (April 1st, 2013) – In a shocking turn of events this morning, ultra-far-right Representative and GOP Presidential candidate Michele Bachmann has embraced the social justice platform of Christian Democrats of America and will now be the organization’s leading spokesperson. “Rep. Bachmann reached out to us over Easter weekend, literally begging to help CDA’s mission,” says Christina Forrester, Executive Director and Founder of the organization. “She said she spent the weekend reading her Bible and coming to many new conclusions on values. She has chosen CDA as her new social justice values platform and we are happy to have her!”
Ms. Bachmann says she understands this move will mean she will have to turn from 90% of her previous agenda. “Hey, if you’re going to follow the social justice teachings of Jesus and start a new path, you have to go all out, right?” says Bachmann, whose first speech will be focused on going beyond Obamacare to total Universal Healthcare, her new priority agenda item.
“We hope this will set a new precedent for all Bible-toting far-right Republicans and Tea Party members,” says Forrester. “Too bad it’s an April Fools joke.”
Happy April 1st all!